Dear Conor

Dear Conor,

You are 18 months now and if you were here, I'm sure your vocabulary would have expanded even more. I imagine you would be telling us stories and repeating everything Tessa said. This last week has been tough. Daddy went back to work which was really hard for him. Tessa and I had a pretty busy week, but everything we did made me think of you and how much fun you would have had with us. We went to visit day care. They had a beautiful bulletin board up of your pictures. We popped in and said hi to all of your friends. I think everyone misses you a lot. We say Tayree and Joy and I know they definitely miss you.

We joined St. Mary's Mother's group and there were a few other 18 month olds there. I think you would have loved playing with them. We also went to The Giggling Pig for a Mommy and Me art class. I think you would have had a lot of fun there and I'm sure it would have been a huge mess, but I miss your messes. I can just see you with paint in your hair and all over your clothes, but with the biggest smile.

Our house is so quiet now. You filled it with so much joy and happiness and laughter. We had a few visitors today. Uncle Max, Auntie Tara and Ma. I know you would have loved playing with them.

Tessa has been talking about you a lot. I know she misses her partner in crime. She was taking pictures of us today and I could just see her running after you saying "Conor, say cheese, smile. I want to take a picture of you." And then I could see you smiling, but then running away from her, gleefully.

It is hard to believe that Thanksgiving is next week. I know you would have loved trying all the foods.

I can't tell you how much I miss you and how hard it is to experience each day without you. I think I have spent 2 nights of your life apart from you and now it's been almost a month and each night is unbearable.

I love you, my perfect boy. I wish I could give you the biggest hug.

Good night my angel.

Love,

Mommy